Holding back with the one who broke me (a confession from my heart)

We created our world much better based on what we experienced. But what if by chance, chapters that were part of our past comes back to help us create a colorful new beginnings.


I have been through a lot in my life. As a 32-year old mother, I have single-handedly supported my child in the best of my abilities. Working in different kinds of fields, nursing, being a call center agent for office and even home, teaching in private and public and not to mention, being a host. It used to be complicated at the beginning, yet it furthered me to become a strong person. Doing a lot of jobs doesn’t mean gaining millions, it means there is a reason for the hard work… my one and only son.


As time goes by, I felt the need to have a company. I feel that I am ready for something that would somehow level up my being. It can’t be denied, I am feeling the need to settle down, to be with someone who could be my partner in my day to day struggles and significantly my son’s best friend. I come to realize now, that a boy can gain many best friends as much as he can, but there is no good as seeing him laugh and hold hands joyfully with his dad. At first, it was too awkward and difficult to combine both universes that has been devastated by a horrible past. But at the end of the day, life is too short not to forgive and not give chances. Even if I considered it was my ultimate heart break, but he will always be my forever one great love. 


Things has literally been doing fine lately and I have decided to step forward for my life and for our future. We all know there is no assurance for every thing, and things may be uncontrolled for us to keep it from falling, but what is really important would be the amount of strength to conquer inevitable situations to keep us in our own line.


YES!!! We are back in each other’s arms and will dance our lives to forever.



Samdayoneday 2019





I can still remember the time my father bought me some make up essentials way back after college. From lipstick with various glosses – light to dark red, palettes and blush on. That particular cosmetic store was new in our city back then and people were most likely to visit it as it offers wide array of beauty products. My father didn’t hesitate buying it because the store sells their product at a lower and reasonable price. This wasn’t my first time adoring make-ups. During my elementary years, I owned my very first pressed powder. I could still visualize my mom’s facial expression when I used it, like it was so not normal for my age to be using pressed powder at all. Little did I know, make-up and these cosmetic products will be my source of strength in fighting against depression and bullying.

In 2009, I gave birth to my son. There were some noticeable changes in my body including my face. Normally, when a woman gives birth, she gains weight and loosing will probably take time. That wasn’t the case with me, I immediately lost my pregnancy weight, though my breasts went saggy and dark lines like linea negra, took a while before it slowly vanished. As a new mommy, my son became my new priority. Even my parents’ attention switched to our new member without any hesitation. It was all good but deep inside it wasn’t. Before I gave birth, I had a lot of insecurities and I’ve tried fighting against it. Few people knew, including my mother, whom I’ve never expected to have knowledge on what I was going through. I get unknown SMS and calls, even social media posts from different people who were trying to bring me down and totally made my life miserable.

Posted b&w.JPG

Until one day, I finally knew who they were. That chapter in my life hits me the most. I asked myself a hundred times – “What is wrong with me?” A very simple question, yet it took me years to find an answer. Even with my son’s presence, the bullying didn’t stop. They deliberately posted photos bragging about how they look on their night outs or getaways, while I’m stuck at home and basically can’t do anything about it. They kept telling me that my son doesn’t resemble me because I am short and dark-skinned unlike him. This might seem just like any other woman’s issue, but it made me feel so depressed. I admit, it took years to get over it but slowly, I started figuring out where to begin, what armor to use and how to be whole again. Although my mom didn’t tell me, she knew exactly what I was going through. She even had to buy me a set of facial treatment package that was quite expensive, so my face will lighten up and asked her sister who’s working abroad, to send something called a ‘magic cream’ to help eliminate or remove dark spots on my neck, stomach and legs.

Support comes in so many ways and there I found myself loving the abundance of make ups I receive from my loved ones. I feel good using it. It makes me feel confident. Every time I feel bad, I cover myself with it, like a shield and it definitely wipes away all my sadness and tears. The girl I saw in the mirror, with sadness on her face, is now smiling confidently head up high. It sounds crazy but that is how it works for me, even until now. We all have different coping mechanisms and this is where I found strength which helps me fight and move on with life.

blog pic

For years now, I practiced enhancing myself with the use of other make ups through video tutorials, reading articles and reviews about cosmetics, preferably by reliable artists, bloggers and other users. It widens my knowledge and even skills especially in applying the right stroke of brushes to use for every make ups. Even buying costly yet quality products are now considered, because most of these lasts longer and does not damages or irritates my skin.

For mothers out there, we face a challenge in getting a ‘me’ time, as we are all busy with taking care of our children. We must not forget to take a break. Let’s pamper ourselves by visiting our nearest spa and salon. It is a reward you can give to yourself for doing the most valuable job in the world. For those who are applying for jobs or work that requires assisting customers physically, we all know that these types of job requires a pleasing personality. Pleasing personality may mean well-groomed, cheerful and for other companies, it may mean good looking. So wearing light and simple will absolutely help. As an event host, I always make sure that I am wearing the appropriate make-up that matches my ensemble. This gives me more command on stage and definitely catches my guests’ attention.



snowwhite evil.jpg

Just like a person who needs another, make-ups are not just something I wear, it’s a tool I use to hide my negative feelings and reveals the better version of me. With it, I learned to love myself, gave myself more importance and confidence.


The world is cruel sometimes and we all have the power to control those who wants to drag us down. Today, I declare a toast to my fellow make up addicts, for staying longer in front of the mirror! Cheers and keep on slaying! Always remember that there will always be a lot of Snow White’s evil stepmother in this world who’s watching and asking “who is the fairest of them all.”  🙂



Photos : @ianorbs photography

When love and hate literally collide

Even in the midst of loving, cuddling whether in an early morning or middle of the day and even exchanging sweet thoughts, couples encounter issues especially when likes and dislikes are laid down. It could extremely be draining when no one’s going to give up. Like is it going to be how pride works versus love?


Well, men are known to be superior and eliminates emotions most of the time as this would shield them from showing their weaknesses… but not all the time. When a man truly loves a woman, he accepts for what and who she is, same with a woman. However, because of how society works, men forbids to see the feelings behind every woman disagreements in certain things. And because some women are stronger than her yesterdays pain, she boldly shout, scream and strongly stands her point.


It isn’t sad. For these are all normal in the lives of couples. Without showing who you are and what your imperfections as a partner or even as a person, one’s partner will never see the beauty of his or her one true love. So just be yourself and always be kind and understanding. Understanding in the sense that you listen, and feel the importance of each words being uttered. Remember that you were not present during his life before, so you might still discover where those opinions are coming from. So it is a must to be a partner and a friend at the same time.


Thanks @ianorbs photography for the photos :


Fashion hotpicks

top Filipina bloggers

Fashion trends has always been a way to share your insight about who you truly are. I strongly believe that even Kylie Jenner, at her very young age though controversial on the way she brings herself to the public, but it makes her comfortable to wear what she wants. She even mentioned that she prefers to shop on the men’s section because she can pull something out from those apparels. Considering that Im a single mom, still,  I always look forward on what to wear and what is not… We all know that not all dresses fits the plus sizes to thin ladies or vice versa.

I got two of my most favorite Philippine fashion blog site, and I believe, I am not the only one whose admiring them but millions out there. I am so proud of there influence to all young women, empowering and boosting self-confidence to be beautiful in their own fashion sense. The sisters Vern and Verniece are very lovely and with their book VV, they talk more about being sisters and being there all the time, even if they go out to travel, they look and wear almost exactly the same to the extent that they look twins. That is why they are famous of “twinning”, as what they say. If you want to see more about there “twinning”, you can also visit there website 

Processed with VSCO with f1 preset

Another hot fashion icon of today’s generation, is a sister of Philippines top stylist Liz Uy. She is considered to be  Philippines top fashion blogger, with all her multimedia ads over Youtube and televison. Every time she speaks and shows herself on the crowd, she always has that swag. I like her fashion taste, because she is into something that I think, may be comfortable and might suit me… apparels with less details. One more thing to add, is her swim suits that are totally something new to the eye, and coming from my friends opinion, it always caused women to look for the brand she wore. Try visiting her  website  to get the latest look of the new Filipina trend these days.




Chasing liberty to chasing stability

samsafeIts been 2 years since I’ve decided to stand in my own feet. Let go of fears and set out my feelings free. Still I fumble and fall, run into the wall and when it comes to you… (Oh the harsh songs…) Welcome to my page!!! Yes, 2 years when I decided to do something real big for myself which made me a better me. I know its one of the most difficult time in my life but its the biggest chapter that created color. I never knew that I became an accomplished mom, knowing how dependent I am before.

My life is not the typical story everyone has. To my friends and loved ones whom I owe so much of it, I valued every single thing you’ve made for me. Now that I am moving to  another chapter of my life, hoping that everything will be another chance, another opportunity not just for me but for my son’s future. It will always be a great change in us that will help us evolve to a better one.